you..

you ...

made me realize what this life was truly about. self love & camping.

you gave me a confidence in myself. so different from what i had before.

you ...

reminded me that this moment is good. that God wants us to live without an agenda. you told me never to stop praying.

you gave me joy. more joy then u will ever know.

you gave me an understanding what this young love truly feels like. & i thank you.

& i miss u.

________________

this roadtrip started early. i am wearing my adidas sweatpants & my biggest hoodie. the curly red hair is staticy from these leather seats and yes i feel fat and gross. that maybe how your sposed to feel after 12 hours on the road. all i've eaten is dried mangos and nuts all day so idk why i feel fat. maybe cause i didn't do the chores this morning. the moon is so big. & i like to imagine all of you watching it with me, being in awe of the same God as i am. that would make me smile.

we are on our way to a meeting in wichita kansas that my dad needs to be at. random eh? it has to do with my church. so me and my mom caught a ride & we will make the best of this trip. which consists of .... going to Colorado to see my best sister. i. stinking. can't. wait.

chia seed kombucha sits in my stomach reminding me of health by gurgling. the moon is so big & the sky is trying its hardest to be dark. contrasting against the moon. but the moon is succeeding in keeping the sky a dark blue.

sometimes i imagine you on this roadtrip with me. that makes me smile.

the middle point of this trip consists of jyl.

a blonde haired bundle of joy. she is truly a joy. & her name is jyl. a joyjyl. get it? i am so excited to be with her. because she will make me grin lots.

slowly the ink sinks lower & her mind is lacking.

eyes close shutting out the drone of the motor.

shutting out the moon. out the sky.

out the present.

& she is in the future.

God is holding her hand & she is smiling.

as they run.

across the land.

into chapters she never knew existed.

experiencing moments she was waiting for.

the Wyoming mountains watched. - ginger.