I miss u.

the sun still rises every morning over your back porch. the gold blanketing your beautiful yard. the dew collecting on the brave flowers. the flowers that you loved so much. & soon they will wither because fall has come. I used to rush through your front door & id yell "knock knock". & you'd yell "back here" & then we would talk & drink tea. & go check the garden. we'd make supper & the guys were always late so we would wait for them & watch the sun sink down behind the trees. . & when they would come we'd sit down & thank God for life & love. & we'd eat the corn chowder that you made & I helped stir. & after pete would go get pistachio ice cream from the garage. & then we'd do dishes. monty & I would go work on our cabin after & you would come down there with your tea & watch us. we loved it when you would do that. now as I stare at the fall colours. & the moon coming is bright tonight. I think of you. & the lump in my throat makes my head hurt. I dreamed last night that I had to say goodbye to you all over again. & I woke up with tears. you aren't there in that big house. I go there to clean. & make food. & you're not there. but i use your favourite dishes. & I wash your favourite blanket on the couch. I try to leave it how you'd like. I miss you alot mama sheila. it's different with you gone & I want you to know, the tea is always on if you want to stop in. xoxo. jessi shianne.